Not too long ago I would wake up in a bad mood and the day would progressively get worse. You know those days where everything turns to rubbish … let’s be totally honest here – they turn to shit.
WARNING! Swearing is dotted throughout. It felt right, so I’m sorry if you are offended. If you are, maybe my rawness is not for you.
Those days would be a regular occurrence for me. I was having one of those days not so long go. And here is how it unfolded.
Now before I get to it, the reason why I’m sharing this is when you master this skill, your life changes rapidly and those days seem to last for minutes and come a lot less often.
Okay. So, I woke up feeling annoyed and angry, switching from one to the other – for absolutely no reason. The emotions were strong and I thought, “am I going to be productive like this?”
Absolutely not! I was not in the mood to lift a finger, other than a finger to say you know what.
So here I am with a full days’ of work ahead and absolutely no intentions doing any of it … other than the two-fingered salute.
I said “right. I’m going to sit with this. Fighting and ignoring this doesn’t work. I did that for years.”
I want you to give yourself permission to accept that everyone has bad days. The feeling amazing and bouncing out of bed (the personal development books pipe dream) saying my life is amazing, “I’m so grateful”, is unrealistic to achieve every day. And if anyone says they have those days every day are either:
- lying, or
- not being truthful with themselves and certainly not growing. Think of growing pains.
So after two minutes (no word of a lie), this is how quick it gets when you do it enough times – the major hurdle for most is remembering and catching yourself.
Okay, so back to it. I realised I’m feeling disrespected hence the anger and annoyance. I won’t bore you with the detail but here are the nuts and bolts
I found a part of me was disrespectful of my needs, and therefore when I felt disrespected, it hurt.
Now you maybe are thinking “well, of course, you feel hurt that’s a normal reaction.” I’m going to flip this concept on its head. It’s not and here is what I’ve learnt in years of practice.
When we experience a strong reaction or emotion such as anger, as I did, it’s your body’s way of saying “I’ve had enough of holding on to this now. Can you do something about it?”
What do we do? Hide, suppress, ignore, that’s why it doesn’t go away and many people end up living in these feelings and heavy emotions for most of their lives and don’t even know.
The trick here is to sit with it and know it will pass. But you have to listen as your body is talking to you and ignoring it creates chaos – both internally and externally.
Ask the following:
- Why am I feeling this way?
- What is my body showing me I’m holding on to?
- What do I need to know about this?
We create stress on our bodies when we do have these conversations. The stress, in turn, has an impact on how our body functions. In other words, it makes life difficult for your body to do its job keeping you healthy and alive. Your mind to concentrate so you can create what you actually want.
My question to you is how long are you willing to be on the emotional spin cycle?
I stand for truth, realness and openness with a hint of raw so you can be too as it’s the only way we can heal.